Escalator Trolls

I've been pretty busy lately, working, wedding planning, and preparing for my show that opens next weekend. So any chance I get to relax, even if only a few seconds, is important to me. But people seem to not want to let me have my relax time! Let me set the stage for you...

Its a day like any other. You are in the mall, airport, train station, etc. You leisurely step onto the escalator and intend to enjoy the ascent/descent, to take those 20 seconds or so as a break from your day....nope.....the person in front of you rushes up the already moving stairs, and you can hear the person behind you sighing and breathing loudly in a tone that you know is meant to tell you to hurry up/down the escalator.......escalator troll.
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Dear Escalator Troll,

I'm sorry that you mistakenly went up my automatic staircase when you meant to take the manual stairs. I will not be moving until this staircase takes me to the end of its mechanical road. If you wanted to set your own pace, you are in the wrong place. Next time, when you want to walk up the stairs, don't get on this moving staircase, get on the regular stairs. Thank you. Dweeb.

Signed,
LaNeshe