One of the big things that I think on in my relationship is the concept of emotional responsibility. Emotional responsibility has two sides.I am responsible for my husbands emotions. Meaning, as his life partner, I cannot ignore his feelings or emotions, even if they have nothing to do with me, or if there is nothing I can do myself to change the situation. It is important in our relationship, and any relationship, that no one feels like their emotions are being ignored, even if the other person can't relate or doesn't agree with the level of emotional reaction.
on the other hand...
I am responsible for how my emotions affect my husband. He loves me, and because of that he can't help to be upset by my upsetness, or saddened by my sadness. Because of this, even in the craziest fits of emotion I have to keep him and his feelings in mind, and determine whether my tantrum over there not being any chocolate chip cookies left at Wawa is worth straining both of our emotions.
Both of these sides apply to both of us, and to both sides of any relationship.
It is a big step to make as a person to take on the 'burden' of another person's emotions, and learn to evaluate your own for the sake of another person. I believe this happens on a small scale with friendships and even work relationships.
So this is one of the biggest things I consider when I think about being (or not being) in a relationship, emotional responsibility. I HAVE to consider someone else's feelings if I enter in a relationship of that nature. I consider my friend's feelings, but it's not my responsibility to see that they feel better (not necessarily at least) where as if I choose to be with someone romantically I have to consider their feelings and how MY feeling impact them.
ReplyDeleteI am not selfish (ok... Yeah I am), but I prefer at this time to not have that responsibility. Dealing with my unruly feelings is enough sometimes.
Emotions...The bane of humanity. The comprehension of good days and bad days I believe can affect them more than anything. If a person doesn't realize their negativity can jack up the atmosphere they need to fix it. You choose to let your emotions affect people or be affected. So I say if somebody can never wake up on the right side of the bed push the bad up against a wall.
ReplyDeleteMr. Anonymous